Foroak

Before Valentine's Day, let's talk about sex, baby – and babies

What are you doing for Valentine's Day? Clubbing? Dinner date? Are you among the 40% of couples getting engaged from November to Valentine's Day?

 

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Let's have the talk. About sex. And what can come nine months after Valentine's Day: babies. No, this is not that kind of talk, prevention or abstinence. It's not even about how soon is too soon to have sex when dating someone new. This is about bringing life into the world, and how that life will change your life.

Whether you're in a serious relationship or just exploring people, this is a talk you should be having – not only with the person you're dating but, most important, with yourself.
The question is not just: Do you want children?

I'm a mother of four, and I'm continuously surprised at how little people talk about such a possible life-changing event.

The question is not just do you want kids or are you ready? If you are, how do you want to raise your children? What kind of parent will you be and what do you expect from your partner? How about religion? Race? Politics? Education? If you're not able to have kids, are you willing to risk the pain and the costs of medical assistance? How about adoption, or a surrogate?